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Jean(Muriel)'s avatar

My husband and I recently decided to move into a “ senior living community”. House up for sale, painters, packers, movers, new cat issues… then last week we cancelled everything, came home to “ our house “ and slept better . Lost 10% of a hefty commitment, gave up another $8,000. of new apt decorating…. But in our old selves mirror we didn’t see ourselves on this cruise ship of everyone looked like us. We could not erase the feeling of “we’re stepping into our grave”!

Other residents were warm and welcoming and helpful. One didn’t have to cook much. The trouble is I still love to cook and I need young, old, middle age around to share life. We are back in our house…. husband losing his memory, me losing my interest in perfection of clean living… but it is ours and maybe, just maybe we can all come together and get the evil doers out of our government. That is worth a last gasp!

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Graciewilde's avatar

As I told you in the email , Murie, I am so proud of you for doing what you knew to be right for you. The cultural pressure to yield to a living situation that is easy for others is huge. I always want to be where there are kids and teenagers, and young adults, and all the rest. I do understand that there are situations where full time care is necessary but , until that time , I hope to live independently. I’m not fond of cooking but I also don’t need fancy meals. I am happy to make and eat very simple, very healthy meals. I don’t want institutional cardboard.

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Manuel A Garcia's avatar

We went to a facility and almost bought the pitch. Looking back at the experience it felt like a prison. One sales point that helped us make up our mind was when the sales lady enthusiastically said that they even had a men's group that met weekly and that the topics of religion and politics were not allowed. LOL. Politics is life! Religion is where we struggle to find meaning in that life. BUT, situations change and we are all of different perspectives. Enjoy your decision — whatever it might be AND each blessed moment. 😎

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Graciewilde's avatar

Yikes! No discussion of politics or religion???? What else is banned?

My siblings and I had to make the painful decision to move our mother to assisted care as her health needs were not manageable w/o that. In the end, it worked out well for her b/c she was lovingly cared for even as she was slipping cognitively away from us. Had she not had that severe cognitive slippage, it would not have been a good placement for her. I had excellent rapport with the director and caregivers and I knew she was able to make some choices that other places might not have allowed. She only lived there for ten months but I am grateful that we found that situation.

I’m glad both you and Murie are finding other arrangements.

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Manuel A Garcia's avatar

At this time we do not need any home assistance, so we are staying put until life hints otherwise. 🏠

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Jean(Muriel)'s avatar

Thank you Manuel! 👏🏻🎶🤗

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heydave56's avatar

Ok, I guess I'll add another book I don't really need but really do need to my list!

Don't look if I tear up, tho.

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Graciewilde's avatar

Oh, you will tear up. But there’s a lot to think about in it.

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Manuel A Garcia's avatar

Thanks for this, Gracie.

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Graciewilde's avatar

It was definitely a memorable book, Manuel.

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Nancy's avatar

♥️ keep shining dear one♥️🌟!

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Graciewilde's avatar

I hope I can! Thank you!

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